Questions

I have been wrestling with  the definition of  "real church" and "real worship". I had a picture of something this morning that may have clarified this for me...

I was half asleep and had the impression of the Lord whispering a question...

    "What would you do if you had an hour with me completely alone?"

I saw myself alone in a wood, and there He was, beside me. I had played this out many times in my mind...I would worship and kiss him and dance and tell Him my love for Him! However...in that wood...in that moment...I just felt very shy. I was awestruck and unsure. He reached and took my hand. We walked together for a time, each saying nothing. I noticed something. I felt a scratching against my hands as we walked.
 It
   was
         the
             scars.
I was transported back to the time when His blemish-free hands offered  the loaves and fishes, holding them up sweetly to the Father to multiply them, feeding the waiting multitudes of people. But the holes in His hands now sweetly give the bread of life to waiting multittudes of people...the permanent black holes that all of the gifts and wonders, throughout all of  time, travel through!

Then..I began to worship.
Not out of tradition or out of duty or  guilt, but out of a quiet reverence of  plain humility in awe of His gift. Maybe that's why he will bear the scars in heaven, so that we would never forget the cross, because facing the cross is where real worship comes through. This midset will enable us to worship...
Forever.

When I woke up fully, I walked into the living room and looked at a painting that I had finished a few weeks earlier. It was his bruised and broken face on the cross, when he said, "It is finished." I didn't want that picture to be the center of my house, I wanted a laughing Jesus or something of the like.

*Sometimes we want our picture of Jesus to be when the throngs of people were throwing branches and crying, "Hosanna in the highest!' But that kind of worship was short lived. The first bit of trouble changed their tone.

*Sometimes we want our picture of Jesus to be one of preforming miracles, but those seem to be quickly forgotten when the next need arises.

 *Sometimes we want our picture of Jesus to be the teacher.. but then we become hardheaded and the teachings don't stick to our ribs like they once did.

But the cross? It's hard to look at, but our response to it will always be the same.
Worship.
 Reverence.
  A place to leave our tears and fears. We will not forget. And we will not leave from that place the same.

So what is "real church"? What is "real worship"?
Church is the place where you take God's hand and wait for the love to come through the holes.
Worship is the place where we are transported to the picture of God's grace and humility of the cross, and we respond the only way we can to being there.
                                                         
                                                             Then
                                                                it
                                                      becomes real for
                                                              Him
                                                              and
                                                               us.